After a long week there's nothing that I like more than to sit on my bed with some cider (or beer - budget depending). As the cider (or beer) flows I watch my Sky+ planner and sift through the depths of reality TV. I have watched skinny morons become 'models', I've watched opinionated, socially awkward idiots design clothes for 'celebrities' and I've even plunged to the lows known as 16 and Pregnant which is about... well, I'm hoping you can work that one out. So, I'm more than happy when October arrives; for October heralds for me the new Eurovision season.

It's been four months since the last Eurovision ended which is the downtime required for me to recharge my Euro-batteries. I often wonder if it's too soon? Am I ready? But when I slip that crispy new DVD into the machine and Ell pops up with what I can only describe as slightly less irritating co-hosts, I know it was the right decision. Let the new season commence!

By the time I've resorted to re-watching Eurovisions, enough cider is flowing through my blood to bring me to that perfect intellectual level. Not too inebriated to process thoughts but just inebriated enough to allow random thoughts to crawl up from the deep recesses of my mind. And one question I have often wondered is the question on the lips of the 32,404 people living in San Marino - does size matter?

On paper, the facts are clear - Europe's smallest nations finds it hard to qualify. Is this because there simply aren't enough allies to vote for them? Is it because these countries simply aren't important enough to European voters? Or are there other factors?

Let's look at the smallest countries. The Vatican has yet to enter Eurovision. Many a fan await the day when the Pope announces a six-piece catholic boyband are on their way to the host nation with the song Condom-A-No-No, but as yet his Pope-ness has been silent.

Next up in Monaco. Ah! The Vegas of Europe! Monaco is a tricky one. They may be only two square kilometres big but Monaco have the anomoly of being a winner. However! Without wanting to take anything away from Monaco, their winner has elements of interest. Firstly, it was 1971. French was HOT. The glory days of the French language at Eurovision were alive and well. In fact, Monaco's winner was French herself and was reported never to have never even set foot in Monaco! She sang about a bench, a tree and a street in French conducted by a French composer - a song written by a French team. Sorry Monaco, but I'm going to have to say that this was quite possibly a second French entry at the 1971 contest in Dublin. Okay, that might be a bit mean (but true) so we'll let you have the win Monaco but, let's look at recent form.

A 24-year absence from 1980 to 2004 saw Monaco return with just three songs. 2004 was a low-tempo song sung badly by a French teenager, 2006 was a typical 1960s chanson sung by a French girl - a song written by the same bloke as the year before, and 2006 saw Monaco in the throes of death with it's bizzare entry La Coco Dance - sung by a French girl. The only difference for the principality was the introduction of the entirely out of place Tahitian language. No, I'm not making this up. So, were Monaco ganged up on? Or were Monaco's post-semi-final entries simply not up-to-scratch?

With no entry from Gibraltar yet (although I look forward to an Anglo-Spanish concoction) we move to San Marino. Perhaps the confused teenager of Europe? Are they Italian? Are they Sammarinese? Their first ever entry in 2008 was by a mix of Italian and Sammarinese blokes - a pop group called Miodio. Cynical fans saw this dreary (although not awful) entry as a ruse. Big brother Italy had been AWOL since 1997 and many people saw this as a 'test-the-water-for-a-possible-return' entry. Was it simply Italy in Sammarinese clothing? Either way, five points saw San Marino sent home. They took their Italian flag and left, not to be seen again until 2011. The year of Italy's return!!! Coincidence? Some think not. Did they return together simply to guarantee each other points? Hmmmm... Italy may have prospered with it's reputation and Big Five status but little brother San Marino languished in the semi finals, not helped by another dreary (yet not awful) offering by Senit and then the unforgettable but awful Social Network Song in 2012.

Another non-starter, Lichtenstein, means we get to the well-loved and missed Andorra. No principality has gone closer than the 468 square kilometres of this mountainous, landlocked nation. Ignoring the, let's call them 'tester entries' from 2004 to 2006, Andorra really made an impact in 2007. Likeable boyband Anonymous brought out the big guns. Not only were they quirky, cute and singing partly in English, but they also sang about saving the world! How could this not do well? The boys went close to qualifying by finishing in twelfth place - a brilliant feat considering twenty-eight countries were vying for just ten qualifying spots. But sadly, no qualification. Gisela didn't embarass herself in 2008 (apart from the outfit - I feel this lost her major points) but it was just one year later in 2009 that we last saw them. Two fifteenth place finishes in a row saw Andorra never qualify and pack their bags and leave. The third and final principality to have never qualified.

Only San Marino keep trying, assuming they return in 2013. What can we conclude from this? That size matters? Quite possibly? Or perhaps that these small countries don't have the brilliant songwriters? In which case, again, size matters.

But wait! What's this? Is that an exception to the rule I see? Oh my! It is! How could we forget a country that is smaller than Andorra? At only 316 square kilometres, we have a country that has not only qualified on several occasions but has also finished second in the post-semi-final era! Does size matter? Do neighbours matter? Or does song writing matter? I don't know - but I suggest you ask Malta.

Follow Stuart on Twitter - @doodelie